How Self-Esteem Without Caring
Creates Selfishness in Kids

The study found that two-thirds of college students had above average scores on narcissism (self-centeredness) which is 30 per cent more than students in the 1980's.

Self-centeredness problem

The study says that narcissists (self-centered people) tend toward infidelity, dishonesty, and game-playing.

Professor Jean Twenge, author of Generation Me: Why Today's Young American Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled, and More Miserable Than Ever Before, asserts that today's young narcissists “react aggressively to criticism and favor self-promotion over helping others.”

Since the 1980's children have been taught to repeat, “I am special,” and many other confidence builders. Some children have become overly confident and self-centered. How can you build self-confidence without turning your child into a selfish kid?

Self-esteem solutions must include:

• Family Values

Empathy for others
Social skills

Creating healthy self-confidence with high self-esteem

Teach family values in family meetings where respect, problem solving, and commitments to improve the family are featured.

Teach children to care about others by discussing the social dilemmas all kids face.

Teach children social skills that include kindness, understanding and promoting other kids.

Hold family meetings. You have years of opportunities for holding family meetings. They help children think outside themselves, consider each member's feelings, and practice the values they learn throughout each week.

Discuss moral dilemmas. Children face many moral dilemmas from the time they enter school. Discuss those dilemmas to help your kids care about people outside the family and get beyond thinking about “me, myself, and I.”

Role-play social skills. Children learn to treat other people with respect and help others feel good about themselves. This will boost self-confidence in your children and in all whom they touch.

Self-esteem conclusion

Telling your child to repeat affirmations like, “I am special“ is fine as long as it excludes the self-centeredness that leads to anti-social values. Encourage positive self-affirmations from your child. Give your child positive affirmations that include family values, empathy for others, and social skills.

If you do, your children won't be selfish. Instead they'll become people of character with healthy self-esteem.