I always consider that to be a great question because it shows a
desire to treat people right. It also shows understanding that the
best way to get what you want is to make the other person feel good
about themselves, as well as about you.
Have you ever witnessed a person saying, "That's my final offer -
take it or leave it!"? If that's happened to you, did you "leave
it" even if it was a decent offer? People do that because no one
wants to be treated unkindly. Let's face it, the ego elicits the
making of emotional decisions and, if insulted (and unless they
have tremendously high self-esteem), people will often make
decisions that aren't good for them.
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The ego elicits emotional decision making...When insulted, people will often make decisions that aren't good for them
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And, even if they are in a
position where they must accept now, they'll be tempted to somehow
sabotage the arrangement and/or do what they can in the future to
make life difficult for that person.
Some people, when refusing an offer, respond in a similar fashion.
They might say, "There's no way I'll accept that. You must give me
'such and such' or I'm walking." This then puts the other person in
a situation where, if they agree, they have just "backed down" or
"submitted."
On the other hand, we can very pleasantly turn down an offer while
allowing that person to "save face" and still understand they need
to come back with a better offer. For example:
Salesman Steve: This is the price for the widget, and delivery
will be in two weeks.
You: Thank you, Steve. I appreciate the offer. Unfortunately, at
that price and the long delivery time, "I couldn't justify" making
the purchase. But I DO appreciate the offer.
You've very kindly, politely and respectfully (which, in his mind,
has just separated you positively from many others) said no, while
leaving his feelings totally intact. People like Steve desire to do
business with people like you.
Now, say nothing and see if Steve
comes back with another offer or asks you what price/delivery time
you were thinking.
If, after a few seconds, he says nothing (and
assuming you really want the widget enough to pursue this), simply
say: "Steve, what can you offer that would help me to justify the
decision to buy?"
He'll either come back with something better, or he won't. There's
no guarantee he will. (Sometimes, it's a condition, not a choice,
meaning that he has no room to negotiate further.) The choice will
then be yours as to your decision.
However, what I can guarantee is
that if you'll proceed with the "I couldn't justify . . ." response
as opposed to a simple (or less than nice) "no", the odds of him
going out of his way to make you happy will increase dramatically.