What makes a good communicator "great"? Why do some speakers stand out as charismatic, charming, approachable or likeable, while others are easily overlooked or forgotten?

Think about individuals that you've enjoyed as communicators or professional speakers. Talk show phenomenon Oprah Winfrey is not known as a great orator, but she is certainly a highly regarded speaker and communicator.

As a communicator, Oprah shares three specific characteristics with a number of other well-known personalities such as motivational speakers Tony Robbins and Zig Ziglar, and American politicians Ronald Reagan and Barack Obama: As popular speakers and communicators, they are all perceived as sincere, knowledgeable and humorous.

An examination of these three characteristics not only reveals why they are so important when attempting to reach a wide and diverse audience, but also shows how anyone can practice and acquire these important traits.

Sincerity

The first and foremost item on the list is sincerity. People want and appreciate a speaker they feel is authentic. Nothing turns people off more quickly than someone pretending to be someone they aren't.

There are at least four elements that contribute to what we perceive as sincerity.

First, people who are perceived as sincere speak in a conversational tone. This means you must speak in a tone of voice that people will feel is how you normally talk in your everyday life, such as when you're with friends in your living room or gathered around the kitchen table.

In such informal situations you share your ideas naturally and without pretense. This may be one of the reasons why Oprah is so successful; when you listen to her, you get the feeling she is really the person you hear and see on TV.

Roger Ailes, who served as a speech coach for Presidents Ronald Reagan and George H.W. Bush, said: "The best communicators I've ever known never changed their style of delivery from one situation to another." Ailes said these individuals are the same whether they are "delivering a speech, having an intimate conversation, or being interviewed on a TV talk show."

This quality of consistency in communication style contributes to the perception of authenticity. In fact, it's even been said that honest arrogance is preferred over false humility. Why? Because we all want to know people are showing their true selves and that what we see is what we get. This quality of consistency significantly contributes to the characteristic of sincerity.

Second, to be perceived as sincere, speak only about things you truly believe in and feel passionate about. An audience can sense when a speaker is truly passionate about his or her message. That passion makes others want to listen more closely.

The truth is that most audiences are eager to find something they can get excited about and they are happy to follow you if you inspire them with your own enthusiasm. Motivational speaker Tony Robbins is a textbook example of this.

Finally, let people know something about how you are as a person. This is where you let your humanity come through. Let them know some of your "personal secrets" that are relevant to the topic.

For example, let them know where you've made mistakes along the way before learning a valuable lesson that can also help them. If you explain how you fell and skinned your knee before getting up and achieving your eventual victory, they will want to know how you did it and how they can do the same.

Sharing your human side makes you more approachable and easier for an audience to relate to.

Knowledgeable

To be perceived as knowledgeable, it's important to deliver solid content. Even a speaker who lacks charisma and polish will always find an eager audience if he or she becomes known for delivering information that people find valuable to their lives. This is most readily accomplished by:

• Delivering information that is practical and easily applied.


• Laying out the steps to follow to implement your practical advice.


• Hanging each of your major points on a "hook" that will enable listeners to recall them quickly. Stories and examples are the best and most memorable hooks.


• As a teacher or trainer, using a variety of teaching methods so your content will have retention value. To connect with those who are visual learners, use a prop or visual aid. For those who are more auditory, use stories or specific examples. For those who learn best by experiencing concepts firsthand, create an exercise where they have to do something. To reach the widest possible audience, mix all of these techniques in your skill-building presentations.

Humorous

The ability to laugh or find humor in a situation is one of the characteristics that distinguish human beings from animals. Humor, well done, opens hearts and makes audiences receptive. The best and safest humor is always self-deprecating; when we are not afraid to laugh at ourselves, we are perceived as mature, emotionally well-balanced, and trustworthy.

If you want to be funny, tell stories, not jokes. Why? Because jokes can backfire. For example, if you tell a joke and no one else thinks it's funny, the audience is left thinking, "She thought that was funny but it's not. I wonder if I can trust her judgment on other issues..."

On the other hand, if you tell a story with a relevant point that you happen to think is funny but no one laughs, everyone will just think it was a story. Because a story lacks the joke set-up, there's no built-in expectation that it's supposed to be funny. If it is funny, people will laugh. If it isn't, it will just seem like another story and there's no harm done to your credibility.

And remember, when it comes to humor it's only funny if they laugh. Choose your stories carefully and make note of which ones are effective laugh getters and which ones aren't. After a while you'll develop a kind of sixth sense about what works for you and what doesn't.

© 2009 Morris Taylor.

Reprinted with permission from Morris Taylor's bimonthly Internet newsletter, The Training Clipboard For your own personal subscription, go here

Keynote speaker and training consultant Morris Taylor has been involved in education and training for over 25 years. He is is owner and President of Talisman Training Associates, LLC.

Some Related Articles:

3 Critical Elements of All Effective Communication
How to Be More Charismatic When You Speak
Get Your Message Across by Creating Powerful Stories